- RT @Laughbook: Tom, it's been thirty years man..you're never going to eat Jerry… #
- RT @BestAt: RT @thesulk: I avoid eye contact with myself in the mirror. I know too much about me. #
- RT @clarkekant: The only way boobs could be any better is if they could shoot laser beams and dispense coffee. #
- RT @FreddyAmazin: When I die I want my tombstone to say… “BRB”
^__^ # - RT @funnyoneliners: The nice thing about living in a small town is if I don't know what I'm doing, someone else does. #
- RT @clarkekant: When I die, I hope my brain doesn't play back all the conversations I've had with myself. #
- RT @FreddyAmazin: I'm good at multitasking. I can drop my phone, spill my coffee, wreck the car and yell, "OH DAMN" at the same time #
- RT @JerryThomas: Most days I'd rather be sitting under a bridge and pestering billy goats. #
- RT @Failtext: Booze is the answer. I don't remember the question. #
- RT @NathansReality: When someone tells you it's impossible for you to do something, prove them wrong. #
